May 24, 2012 10:14AM

Facebook Timeline Is A Disease

At least according to this Funny or Die video.

Even if you haven’t caved into Facebook’s Timeline yet, you’ll get it soon whether you want it or not. Combining the Profile and Wall features, Timeline’s intention is to make it even easier to share every moment of your waking life with people who probably don’t care whether you’re “snuggled up in bed with a cup of tea and a DVD... loving rainy days right now!” Basically, it's designed to track one's existence from birth to death, which begs the question: If our (carefully curated) lives can be displayed before us on a screen, why aren't hover boards an accepted form of transportation?

Facebook started to introduce the non-optional Timeline feature a few months ago (provoking love / hate reactions in the process), and is slowly transitioning its billions of users over to the New World Order. A date hasn’t been set for all users to transition over — the internet would probably break if this was to happen — so there are still some users with the (what will soon be) anachronistic version of Facebook, but most of us have already started using the wretched thing.

Funny or Die has made a video that likens Timeline to a debilitating disease — "It doesn't matter how safe you are, you'll get Timeline" — providing commentary on the compulsory change.

For those who want to live in the past (like, 6 months past, not horse-drawn cart past), Social Fixer is a browser extension developed by one of the people from Lifehacker, that promises to "eliminate annoyances" — e.g. Timeline.

Ingrid Kesa

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